One of the dangers of emotional life is that we find that we don’t feel ‘in the moment’: we’re at a funeral, but we don’t feel sad. We’re making love, but our minds are elsewhere. It’s our birthday, but we’re not jolly. Why is it sometimes so hard for our true inner feelings to keep pace with events in the outer world? An investigation into the psychology of feeling in the moment – or to the left or right of it.